Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Mid-January...Pondering the "Blog"....and it's Snowing Again!

I've decided that I'm not going to let my perfectionistic tendencies bring me down as it relates to this new blog. I created it because my old one seemed to be "about" those days that are long past---I wanted a new focus.

But I know in my heart that I'll never be one of those people who can somehow manage to blog daily with lovely pictures and prose and poems. I work full-time out of the home, I have a wicked commute each of those days, I am a single mom.... the hours I have to myself are very limited. I have not been a daily diarist (or journal-writer) since my teens---but those times when I do manage to sit down and journal, when I go back to read those writings now, I know that I was meeting myself where I needed to be. And that is good.

I don't know how other people do it, but I sure do love that they do. I truly LOVE reading blogs and getting inspired. I suppose...if I limited my blog-READING, that maybe I'd have more time for blog-WRITING. But that isn't what I want to do, really. The blog-READING speaks to me, and so, that time I give myself to delve into others' lovely things is a form of self-care for me.

I realize I've been reading blogs since the late 90's, although I don't think they were called blogs then (??). I just remember when I was Manager, and every once in a while, I would log onto this website called Becca-Town and read about this woman and her little son. Then around 2000, there was the blog a woman called Allura kept. She had just gotten a new Bernese Mountain Dog puppy---and oh, how we wanted one too! (But we ended up with our sweet Sheltie instead.)

Then I don't remember much else for a long while---til after the little man was born. And I discovered DOOCE. And FINSLIPPY. And those two, oh my LORD, but they kept me laughing, like peeing-in-your-pants laughing sometimes...

Then when I started the whole homeschooling tangent in his infancy, that's when I hit the mother-lode! I have, over time, trimmed down the list of blogs I regularly read---to only find new ones, ha ha!

Now I actually have blogs in categories on my favorite lists. I have "Check Every Day" for my all-time favorites, then I have a list of Craft blogs, and a list of Religion and Spirituality blogs. I have a category of blogs related to Minimalism (one can dream), and a category of blogs (and sites) related to Sustainability (an interest of mine). There is also Cooking and Nutrition (just because). And then everything else is in a list of Old Blogs and a list of New Blogs. Yeh, I know, those two categories are so revealing, ha ha!

Initially, if I find a blog via a rabbit trail from another place/blog and it looks interesting, I put it in a "Go Back and Check" list. Then, when I have time, I go check it and if it looks promising, I put it in the New Blogs list (or in one of the other categories).

Then when I'm in the mood to see "what's new" in the crafts or the cooking or whatever, I go to those lists. It's nice that way. The "Old" and "New" blog lists aren't too long ("too......") and I check those every couple of days.

I don't expect MY blog to end up on anyone's favorites list. Nor is that my intent. It's really just to have an online journal for myself, for those days when I feel inspired. In this season in my life right now, that's where it's at.

Here's something I wrote in my paper journal way back in January 2007:

...These last few weeks have made me realize I need to look at my motherhood as a vocation and live up to the ideals inherent in that. God gifted me with this precious little boy and I want to wake each morning ready to walk with him thru his day and go to bed each night knowing I gave all the love, wisdom, honor, attention and focus that he needed. A mighty goal. But God is in him just as much as any other person. I want to meet God in him.

And lest I sound too spiritual, the practical falls into that too. In meeting the challenges of my vocation, I need to begin anew attending to better routines and rhythms in our days and weeks...meals, exercise, prayer, sleep, good books, time with family and friends --- all in balance. It's my job to help him honor all the different facets of his life so that he can grow up in "tune"..."

So.. what that means is that I've been needing "to begin anew" for FIVE January's. Imagine. One can strive...

TRUST...means that we agree that God can write the script of our lives, instead of insisting on our own script. (from the Divine Mercy booklet).

Looks like the snow is peetering out a bit. Gonna go check it out. Have a great day!

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